Michael JosephEsq.
Attorney at Law · Mayor · Person of Interest · Facing Contempt Charges
The Record
A partial list of what Michael Joseph, Esq. has achieved for his clients, his city, and — in several overlapping instances — himself.
Secured a record $18.4 million settlement on behalf of a client injured by a defective municipal sidewalk. As Mayor, he authorized the payment. As counsel, he collected the fee. As a resident, he attended the ribbon cutting for the replacement sidewalk, which is named after him.
The client received $340 and a commemorative photograph.
Reduced the Imaginationville Municipal Code from 1,400 pages to 39 pages in a single overnight session, hailed by the Mayor's office as “the most aggressive simplification in the city's history.” Chapter 7 (Ethics), Chapter 8 (Procurement), and Chapter 9 (Recall Elections) were among those simplified.
Chapters were not repealed. They were, per the Mayor, “retired with honors.”
Delivered the city's first new infrastructure in thirty years: a four-lane bridge connecting downtown Imaginationville to a private peninsula containing one home. Completed eleven months ahead of schedule and $31 million over budget.
Memorial to a living person. The Mayor calls this “forward-looking.”
Eliminated a $9 million municipal deficit within six weeks of taking office by locating a second, previously unknown budget. The second budget was larger, cleaner, and, in the words of the City Comptroller, “not one I made.”
The first budget has since been described as “a draft.”
Reduced the Imaginationville City Council from nine seats to one seat, citing gridlock. Council meetings now conclude in under four minutes and pass all measures unanimously. The remaining councilmember is the Mayor.
Public comment period retained. It is ninety seconds and it is on Tuesdays at 4 a.m.
214 verdicts and dismissals in favor of his clients — an outcome rate the firm advertises as “effectively perfect.” 211 of those matters were brought against a single defendant, a retired ferry operator who has since relocated and asked not to be contacted.
Of the remaining three, two were settled and one is sealed by order of a judge who owes him money.
Oversaw the repaving of Main Street with 4,000 commemorative bricks honoring the citizens of Imaginationville. Each brick reads “DONATED BY MICHAEL JOSEPH, ESQ.” The bricks were paid for by a bond measure.
Bond measure named the Michael Joseph Citizens' Brick Act.
Created a new municipal holiday observed the third Tuesday of every month. Attendance at the parade is voluntary, though the parking enforcement division has been instructed to note who is absent.
Now the city's most attended event, and its only mandatory one.
Replaced the city's aging speed cameras with a new network of 210 modern speed cameras, installed exclusively on streets the Mayor does not use. Citation revenue rose 700% in the first quarter.
Vendor is a company whose registered agent is the firm's fax machine.
Launched Imaginationville's first online public records portal, allowing residents to request any city document at any hour. The portal has processed 6,100 requests and fulfilled two, both of which were requests for the portal's hours.
Ledger B is not available through the portal. Ledger B is not available.
By The Numbers
Prior results do not guarantee a similar outcome, a lawful outcome, or an outcome.
| Matter | Year | Result | Fee Arrangement |
|---|---|---|---|
| Pemberton v. City of Imaginationville Pothole; broken ankle |
2018 | $18.4M settlement | Contingency (97%) |
| In re: The Ferry Ownership dispute, vessel |
2020 | Client prevailed; counsel received vessel | Alternative |
| Krunk v. Krunk Family matter; both parties represented by Mr. Joseph |
2021 | Both clients prevailed | Double contingency |
| Imaginationville v. Chomps Nuisance alligator; document destruction |
2024 | Dismissed; defendant could not be located or served | Pro bono |
| In re: Michael Joseph, Esq. Bar disciplinary proceeding |
2014, 2017, 2019 | Reinstated, reinstated, reinstated | Self-represented |
| H. Select Subcomm. on Municipal Irregularities v. Joseph Contempt referral |
Ongoing | Witness described a boat for two hours | Billed to the City |